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Opinion

Commentary: Baggy trousers

The Fort Worth Star-Telegram

April 20, 2009 01:53 PM

This editorial appeared in The Fort Worth Star-Telegram.

C'mon, man. Nobody wants to see your undies.

Who cares whether you wear boxers or briefs, Jockeys or Hanes or Wal-Mart's house brand?

You might be telling yourself how tough you look shuffling along, hitching your waistband up with one hand while your pants sag like you couldn't find a pair that fit.

Ha! You aren't Da Man. You just look dumb.

Think you’ll ever get a decent job that way? Dreamer.

Not only that – you aren't even original. That droopy-drawers look has gotten so ubiquitous (go look it up), how's it an individual statement?

But a fine or even jail time for being crude or rude? What will they outlaw next, mullets on 8-year-olds and cellulite in polyester pants?

Distasteful, sure, but police have better things to do.

Does that mean a court in Riviera Beach, Fla., should toss a local law banning baggy britches into the bin of bum ideas that couldn't leap constitutional hurdles?

It might seem far-fetched to imagine the authors of the Bill of Rights ever hallucinated that free speech and due process would protect the freedom to commit fashion faux pas without being bothered with $150 fines, community service or worse.

But a Riviera Beach 17-year-old's lazy trousers might just take the Constitution there.

To read the complete editorial, visit The Fort Worth Star-Telegram.

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